Showing posts with label the von show. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the von show. Show all posts

The Von Show #16 - All Good Things...

Lovely up-the-nose shot there. And still no pop guard for my microphone. I bet the cat's nicked off with it.



Sometimes, you'll get lucky, and your hand will be forced by forceful forces beyond your control. Sometimes, you'll be clever, and pin it all on Mysterious Circumstances. Sometimes, fate and fortune will conspire against you, and you'll have to face the most onerous trial a gamesmaster ever has to face...

Ending The Game.

Nothing lasts forever, not even cold November rain, and sooner or later we all have to face the music.

Lots of things can drive a game to its conclusion, and not all of them are shames, cautions and eldritch horrors. The worst case scenario is that the game simply IMPLODES, with drama, rage and hilarious personality conflicts driving it to either a swift, quiet, merciful death behind the garden shed, or a seething eruption of fury that leaves chunks of nerd shrapnel in the walls of the gamin' shoppe.

We've talked about that before, by implication, and I want to give it a miss this week, before it ends up taking up the entire instalment with its festering negativity. Instead, I want to explore a few other, less horrible reasons why games have to be put to bed.

Sometimes, you simply reach the end of the material. It's been known to happen. When I was a younger GM, and harboured strange ideas regarding 'telling my story', and also 'not having a game succumb to the Most Common Cause Of Game Death', I devised a Dark Heresy game around ten major events, the idea being that while it might take a few more sessions to resolve, there'd be a definite end in sight, and an underlying structure that would ramp up the interest and see it through to the end. This is also the natural end of one-offs; you have brought people together to play for four or eight or twelve hours and when it's over, it's over. This is fine - it's a fat sight better than the Most Common Cause Of Game Death and, for my part, that tends to be why I've done it.

Sometimes, you are cruelly deprived of a player. People will insist on becoming employed and falling in love and going home or away and just generally leaving in a semi-permanent fashion. (To be fair, in my groups, it's usually been me doing this.) Now, this isn't necessarily the end. Some groups will continue without the errant player or players. Some will go their separate ways, only to reunite in whole or part at some later date. But some will fall over and die, those where the absentee was in some way vital to the group dynamic. Sometimes the group will collapse there and then - "we can't play without Frank," they'll say, "his endearing noobery was what kept us together!" Sometimes it'll lurch on, but something will be off. There won't be quite the same delicate ecosystem of goals and styles, the game will not be what it used to be, and the Most Common Cause Of Game Death will be there, looming on the conceptual horizon.

Sometimes, you just fancy a change. Perhaps you're all Vampired out, and want to give Call of Cthulhu a try. Perhaps your GM has been lagging a bit of late, and rather than face the Most Common Cause Of Game Death, you want to change things up, encourage them to yield up the throne. I've done it, now and then, when I'm in desperate need of an intellectual jigger, and it's generally worked. While I'm not entirely comfortable on the outside of the screen, I like to see how other people do the thing I like to do. It's invigorating, occasionally inspiring, and very rarely there's a tiny dose of schadenfreude as you say "you know what, I may have been a bit wobbly of late, but I'm not as bad as this guy." Whatever happens, in this case the game is wound down, or put on hiatus, but the group continues, game night stays on.

Anything's better than the Most Common Cause Of Game Death.

The Most Common Cause Of Game Death is just... petering out. There's no epic flash-bang of nerd drama, nobody's left or moved away, it's just... a session ends, and nobody really bothers to organise the next one. It's put off "until next week, sometime", or "maybe after the holidays", or "when Frank comes back for his second year", or... you get the idea. A couple of sessions may happen, weeks apart. They'll be phoned in, perhaps. A couple of people will be missing, and nobody quite knows what to do with their characters, or whether they can get away with killing them.

The thing about roleplaying games is that it's perversely hard to get people together for them. I've never been quite sure why. People who will climb over their own grandmothers to get their wargame on and sell the trodden granny-bits in time for Friday Night Magic will suddenly be at the mercy of the calendar when you're trying to organise some Pathfinder. If by some miracle you have managed to herd the cats, you have to keep herding them - it doesn't take much, it seems, for someone to find better things to do with themselves. It just seems that RPGs are the first to fall when time starts a'squeezin'.

There are ways and means around these endings, for sure. The rise and rise of PDF rulebooks, video chat, online dice rollers, Dabbleboard and Obsidian Portal means that in theory you don't actually need to worry about physically making it to sessions. The emergence of ConstantCon means that, in theory, it doesn't matter when you're awake and bored and fancy stabbing some orcs, someone somewhere is running a game.

Thing is, at heart, I'm a bit of a Luddite. I spend my working days looking at screens, working remotely, communicating via email if I'm lucky. On game night I'm actually in the physical presence of other people for a change. I like the tactility of a notebook and pencil and a hastily-sketched floorplan, and the threatening rattle of dice. There's something there with which drawing out plans with a trackball and listening to sampled WAVs of a couple of dice just can't compete. Playing like a throwback means game time becomes tactile, disconnected, immersive, personal, intimate. It becomes very unlike work time, and if there's one thing a game should be, it's not like work.

That's the killer, in the end. When gaming starts feeling like an obligation rather than a pastime, it might be time to stop. Or at least to change. Consider what you're doing. Revise and revitalise. And, if necessary, wind things down rather than letting them stagger and fall.

That's why this is the last Von Show.

Stop that despairing. I hear you there, despairing in the corner. Pack it in. I haven't finished. In fact, that's basically the point. I haven't finished. But I don't have time to script and record and edit a video every week. April is the busiest month in my working year even when I'm not moving house in the middle of it. And, to be honest, I've felt that one or two of the recent instalments have been, well, a bit wobbly, and I haven't necessarily had that much to say in them. Time for a breather and a change of direction.

Apparently Frontline's keeping the seat warm for me. Be nice to him, now. I'll see you in four weeks.

The Von Show #15 - The Non Show

Nobody wants to see my hangover face, do they? No? Good.

This week, I want to talk about hacking.

via teknosis.com
 No, not like that, you nar-nar. I mean hacking games.

via npowerit.blogspot.com
Closer... warmer... but not quite cooking yet. Let me back up and explain a bit.



Ben's had custody of my Dark Ages Vampire rulebook for a week, and the other day, he said:
Like I said though, I was mainly after fluff... and from the couple of bits of rules I DID glance over... you ARE running it differently, ain't you?  :)
Guilty as charged. I never met an RPG I didn't want to hack the guts out of.

In my earliest days as a GM, I was running good old Warhammer Fantasy Role Play at high school - but I only had an hour a day to run it in (hello, lunchtime!) and so sessions had to move fast, and couldn't afford to be bogged down in the minutiae of manoeuvre according to the strict letter of the rulebook. Looking things up meant we got bored and had arguments and wasted time, and so I'd just knock up a spot rule for charging across a narrow bridge and trying to sweep one's foes' feet out from under them, rather than looking up exactly how far the character could charge and what skills and talents had bearing on it and YAWN. The circumstances dictated not so much what I changed about the rules, but the extent to which I was willing to apply them.

This sort of thing only intensified when I started running RPGs for people who were (mostly) not gamers, and actively turned off by dice and sums and random elements, but who had a very nuanced sense of drama and understood that not everything COULD go their way, but that on balance things mostly SHOULD go their way or the story wouldn't move or develop. The kind of people that C- is talking about here - for them, understanding how the game works isn't a process of understanding what all the numbers mean and how to bring them to bear on other numbers (well, two of us COULD do that, but we weren't very good at it - 'twas me and Shiny, two lads utterly incapable of winning at wargames until we started playing each other and one of us had to lose harder). Instead, it's a process of understanding what kind of story you're in and what's supposed to happen. In our case, it was a probably-excessively-inspired-by-Anne-Rice vampire story. People could die, but they'd often come back from it. If people did die, it resounded and reverberated, and they'd stay dead if it happened at the right moment.

via godlikeproductions.com
The characters did not have plot armour. There was a body count; two player characters died within five sessions of being introduced. It's more that characters had minor incident insurance. Nobody was going to die in a random skirmish with a couple of London bobbies, but they WOULD die if they burned down a building they happened to be standing in and couldn't think of/hadn't ensured an escape route. The hack here was removing the random element, which disrupted those players' sense of emerging story, and putting the focus entirely on player skill in environmental and narrative manipulation. If they set things up to have a particular shape, that's the shape they would have. Of course, sometimes things wouldn't come out QUITE as anticipated, because of some other factor that they hadn't known about, or sometimes their success would have unforeseen consequences. It'd be a bloody boring story if the characters knew exactly how it was going to end, now wouldn't it?

In the past I've mentioned that reintroducing the random element to my games gave me problems, but I hadn't quite been able to articulate why until along comes C- again, who does it for me. The big difference that I'd run into here was the difference between 'fortune in the middle' and 'fortune at the end' gameplay, and it was highlighted by a little chat I had to have with Squirrel when I ran Advanced Fighting Fantasy for him last year.

Squirrel has this habit of describing the outcome of his actions as he declares them, before the roll to see if that outcome is successful is being made. Now, I'd automatically locked into a 'fortune in the middle' style, where you say what you want to do, and then try to do it, and then we can get all descriptive and narratorial once we know what's happened. Squirrel had loaded up 'fortune at the end', where he can say exactly what happens and the dice can say "no it doesn't" and the rewind/reset/redescribe factor isn't an issue for him, because he was declaring an intent, not narrating an actual happening. From my point of view, he was narrating, and now I had to make his narration un-happen and make something else happen, and I felt like a goit for doing that, an agency thief.

There's another interesting side-effect to this, which I hadn't spotted until re-reading C-'s post to find the right lines for this one. Here's the bit that's just BLOWN MY MIND:
If you say "I swing my sword" [fortune at the end] you then have to check to see what happens. If you say "I fight the monster" and you fail, you can narrate 100 swings but the outcome of the overall fight is the same without having to check for success or failure of each one.

. . .You can do disparate things, because you're not punishing the rest of the group by having them be bored. Doing something away from the group frequently takes no more time than an action in a round would in a trad game.

A couple of Dark Ages sessions ago, two of the characters - Niko and Ranulf - were trying to sneak past some guards into a tunnel entrance. They were outnumbered seven to two, and the terrain was against them.

I had their players rolling pretty much everything. Throwing a stone to distract a guard? That needs its own roll. Shouting obscenities from the rooftops in order to distract more guards? That needs its own roll. Jumping off a roof and pelting it across the square? Its own roll. And if any guards try to stop you, you're into Vampire combat, which tends to involve a roll to hit, a roll to damage, a roll to soak...

And there's nothing explicitly wrong with that, except that there's another player sitting over there not doing anything, and the longer all this rolling takes, the more bored they're getting, because I'm rolling a bit trad, and making things take time as I resolve them in a very granular, fortune-at-the-end kind of way. It occurs to me that what I could be doing, for things that don't have the entire group involved, is going for a much more abstract one-or-two-rolls describe-what-happens approach, having that whole scene of distract-escape take place in the same amount of table time as one punch might do in a combat. Or even going back to my Old Ways and thinking "failure here would stall the emergent drama, so let's run this in such a way that they can't fail randomly, only through their own ineptitude in decision-making." In effect, I'd be hacking my own playstyle to provide more versatility and fast-forward through granular events that don't involve the whole group. We'd certainly have fewer nights of in-game time that take two or three game sessions to resolve...

The Von Show #14 - Balance Is Boring

Business as usual this week, now with 100% more Hark! This week's technical error: sound quality, as my microphone has lost its pop cover and wasn't really designed for two people anyway. I've done what I can but it's still a bit quiet. Still, you can always skip to the transcript.

Incidentally, if anyone has any suggestions for topics, or thought-provoking questions, don't hold back!


Von - It's come to my attention that many of us are worried about balance. Encounter balance. I was looking through the Pathfinder rulebook the other day, and... the thing about Pathfinder and the third edition of D&D that it's based upon is that it's very very big on the idea of challenge ratings, that you count up the total number of levels in the party and divide by something to get the number of hit dice worth of monsters that you can... see? Dead on her feet already. An awful lot of GM advice goes along the lines of 'present the characters with balanced encounters that they can overcome'.

BOTHER. THAT. NONSENSE.

We are here today to talk about why that doesn't always work, and why unbalanced encounters are a good thing, and in order to facilitate that discussion, Hark here is going to tell you about her vampire.


Hark - AZIZ! Aziz is a Saracen - i think he's a Saracen, not sure if that's the right time period, 'cause we're in Constantinople, at around the Siege of Constantinople. Aziz was in the Third Crusade, and survived it, and came home and is having a bit of a rest 'cause he's a bit of a professional soldier. Unfortunately, then, a load of Teutons* came and battered Constantinople, and Aziz might have almost accidentally got a little bit killed - but it's all right, because a Nosferatu named Safiye came and saw how amazingly brave and stupid he was and made him a vampire.


It is my first Vampire character, I've never played any Vampire before, so i'm a bit... "what is a Nosferatu? What is vampire do? How is vampire formed?". It's a bit of a learning experience for both of us, Aziz and i...

Von - Aziz has died, or nearly died, several times, and the thing about character death is that it's either the result of bad dice, a cock-up by the players, or the encounter being flat-out unbalanced to begin with. Funnily enough, we have three CUNNINGLY SELECTED EXAMPLES - which I have absolutely not planned in any way, shape, or form** - that we can draw upon to illustrate this.

So, Hark - can you tell us how Aziz died the first time?

Hark - Mainly huge heroic stupidity of a Gryffindor nature. He pretty much knew he was gonna die, because there was a load of blokes, armoured up to the eyeballs, in proper Teutonic armour with spikes on it, and they all had proper weapons that they'd been trained in, and Aziz had an oar - and also he is cavalry, so he's not used to being on his feet - and there were forty-seven of them and one of him...

Von - Here's a question. Why did you go and do it?

Hark - Well, i did know that Aziz was ALIVE, and, y'know, this being a Vampire game, at some point he had to not be alive, and also when i chose Aziz i chose him to be a bit Gryffindor-heroic. His Nature is Defender, and his Demeanour is Autocrat, so it was all "i must make sure everyone else gets away, i must defend my place". So it was very in-character for him to be a bit of a prat and charge a line of Teutonic knights...


Von - The point we're building towards here is there was no way in hell that was going to be a mechanically balanced encounter, because what I was gearing up to is that at some point he had to get killed. (Well, he didn't necessarily have to, it could have been one of those loving, tender Embraces, but I wasn't really in the mood, it's a bit played out, and this isn't fucking Twilight.) Given that the character was this sort of heroic defender archetype, the smart money was on him getting killed defending the city, so all I had to do was provide opportunities for Hark to get Aziz killed. If he had by some perverse miracle and luck of the dice managed to overcome those knights, something else would have happened.

Hark - Another rank of knights, i'd have thought.

Von - Yeah. The point being, that was '[un]balanced' as an encounter that he had no chance in hell of surviving - and that was good, because it got the game moving.

Okay, another example of an 'unbalanced' encounter - tell me about the second time Aziz nearly died.

Hark - You are talking about the incident on the ship, aren't you.

Von - Yeah, I'm talking about the incident on the ship.

Hark - We'd decided that we were going to go into Constantinople proper, for plot reasons, so we got in a little row-boat, and rowed away, and my grandsire was pretending to be a Teutonic knight, using his Nos mind-magic, and Safiye was with me and we were being prisoners. Only Aziz is the least sneaky Nos, or indeed vampire, ever. Given an opportunity to botch a sneak roll, he will go "OH DEAR I'VE BOTCHED MY SNEAK ROLL" and do something stupid like drop his sword - no, he bashed his sword into another Teutonic knight or something ridiculous, and we had to start a fight 
'cause they were like "hang on - TEH MUSLIMS!"

It should have been "haha, Aziz is now super-powered, and can batter these blokes that he battered in life, EASILY - and i maintain that Aziz is cavalry, and he doesn't like being on a horse - 'cause there were, like, three blokes, and did i kill one?

Von - You almost killed one. I think you almost knocked him unconscious... yeah, he was out of the fight but not technically incapacitated.

Hark - yeah, so there were three blokes, and they were always on me, and I kept sort of going "Aziz punches one in a battery way", or "stabs one with a sword", and it kept on going "the sword glances off him, the bloke nudges off your hit, he doesn't give a shit that you're a vampire, he's just some super-dice-dodgy-bloke". i rolled some really bad rolls, and the three blokes just kept piling on me, and i think everyone else laughed at Aziz...

Von - I know I did.

That was meant to be a 'balanced encounter'. I'd thought, very very roughly speaking, 'how many dice does Aziz get to roll for hitting people, how many other vampires are going to be on the boat with him, how many mortals is it reasonable to put on the boat for him to fight and have a bit of a struggle with but overcome without getting nobbled?' And the answer was 'not that many'.

Hark - You could have put a hamster - like, a Teuton hamster - on that boat and Aziz would have been, like, "i die! curse you, Hamster!", because seriously i could just not roll a die straight that night.

 Von - And that's another thing about balance. Sometimes, despite the best will of everybody involved, the dice will throw an encounter completely off-base. You've got to roll with this. In any game where balance and probability are an issue, you have to be prepared to say "the dice were not kind there" -

Hark - There's a little bit, as well, where i'd never played a vampire before, and there were bits where he was like "oh, you can spend a blood point", and i was like "what is this blood point? i can spend it? in a shop?" It was towards the end of the battle that Aziz realised he could heal himself, or spend a blood point to increase his hit stuff, and he was like "holy whoa, what is this?"

Von - That's actually a really good point, because whilst I think that was important as a learning experience from which the character learned that he had these powers from being a vampire, the encounter was 'balanced' on the basis that the player involved knew the system, knew what they were capable of, and this is a really big part of the whole Pathfinder thing.

With Pathfinder - I don't want to say you NEED to know what's going on, but it really really does help if you know what you can do, and what all the NUMBERS mean, and where the NUMBERS come from, and if you've got a player who doesn't know what all the NUMBERS mean and where the NUMBERS come from, and the NUMBERS happen to betray them, then it's entirely possible that their character could be killed by NUMBERS.

So, we've looked at encounters which are designed to be virtually impossible - we've also looked at encounters which should be balanced, but which, owing to a combination of bad luck and people not being as aware of the internal balancing factor of the system as they could be, didn't [by which I mean 'weren't]. Now I want to look at an example of an encounter which was unbalanced but which a player managed to overcome, not from knowing all their NUMBERS properly but just from playing intelligently.

Hark - AZIZ!

Von - Tell me about the third time Aziz nearly died.

Hark - Well. For Reasons, a crazy other-Nos was coming to batter everyone Aziz knew, and Aziz was warning some mates of his, some Cappadocians and their Cappadocian human friends, so Aziz was like "WARNING!" and they were like "we totally KNOW, he's already killed one of us" - farewell, Tobias the Pious - and Aziz was "oh, holy shit - right - y'know what? Vampire Uncle, you go warn Vampire Granddaddy".

Vampire Uncle rushed out into the street, and there was a sort of a sad 'thump' noise, and Aziz looked out into the street and saw his vampire uncle's head roll past. And there was crazy Iakov with his huge sword, all "I KILL EVERYONE, ESPECIALLY NOSSES WHO I DON'T LIKE". So Aziz went "holy shit!" and stepped back into the hostelry, and says "anyone know how to fire a crossbow?" Luckily a lady did - she is hopefully going to be Aziz's second wife - but she missed and so Iakov obviously saw us, and we rushed back in with a "hey, does anyone have a plan?"

Someone did have a plan, luckily... anyway, we eventually ended up in the courtyard, and Iakov coming towards us... She was trying to reload her crossbow to fire at him repeatedly, and i thought 'i'm gonna have to take this bloke, giving her a chance to fire at his heart in a hopefully vampire-killing way'. 

And Aziz was slightly scared, and may have soiled his robes a bit - but he had a plan, 'cause previously he'd been talking to some oxen in this courtyard*** and thought "oxen are quite huge, maybe some of them will just run into Iakov and he'll be all 'oh no, oxen!' and then i can stab him".

So i released the oxen, and they ran towards Iakov, and one of them was just like "OOOORRR, charge you!", and he does actually go 'oh shit, oxen', and Aziz hacked him a bit and there was some good hacking, and then he twisted the head off the ox but it was still in the road a bit, so i hacked him a bit more. Then the Cappadocian's plan turned out to be a zombie and he hacked a bit...


Von - Not that you actually needed the help of the zombie, because... the whole point about this story is that by unleashing the oxen, by unleashing this huge charging beastie that the NPC hadn't been expecting, you caught the NPC on the hop. And the ox did horrific amounts of damage. It wasn't actually as much work  to overcome this vastly more powerful vampire as it should have been, because you'd stacked not mechanical bonuses, but the environment against him. You'd gone off and you'd looked for allies, and you'd retreated to a position of relative strength, and you had released some wild beasts to clutter the general business of the encounter... the point being that you adapted the encounter into something that you could overcome despite being mechanically inferior.


This is where the thing about balance really comes in. If you take that sort of Pathfinder sensibility that talks about balance and challenge ratings and making sure that the PC or PCs involved in the encounter can overcome whatever the encounter happens to be, then... that shouldn't have happened. Rather than sort of patronising you and saying "I've given you something you know you can handle", I'd said "I've given you something and it'll rip your tits off if you don't sort it out", and that provokes an intelligence in play that you probably wouldn't have got from going "well, we know that this doesn't matter because it'll be balanced and safe and we can totally beat this with what we've got". Because that would be boring.
 


* - perhaps at this stage I should point out that my Dark Ages Vampire game is less than ENTIRELY historically accurate and the odd mistake has been made, but you know what? There were no vampires in the historical siege, and 1203 isn't the Dark Ages, so frankly we're on a wrong 'un, historiographically speaking, from the start. So fie on thee.


** - no, really!


*** - it's a Nosferatu thing. Aziz seems to be collecting Animals He Can Talk To.

The Von Show #13 - The Very Model Of A Man Inquisitorial

Hey folks.

This week's Von Show has run slightly longer than I anticipated. In fact it's run so long that I can't get it recorded and edited and posted in the time that I have available, given that I have three work deadlines to try and meet in what's left of this weekend, and writing the Show has already taken up a whole morning. However, I didn't want to completely deprive you of my dulcet tones, so... well. Here we go.


Anyway. When I was putting together this week's Top X, I found some of the specialist games easier to get the skinny on than others. Some took a bit of digging - I was there for half an hour trying to find anything good for Warmaster, for instance - but one proved to be a deep and abiding mystery, with nary a peep seemingly uttered about it anywhere on our blog rolls. Inquisitor. This week's Von Show is dedicated to working out why that happened.

Inquisitor, for those not in the know, is "a large scale narrative skirmish game using beautifully crafted 54mm models, and set in the dark world of the Imperium's most covert and mysterious agents. It allows you to play the part of a bold hero or cruel villain in the Warhammer 40,000 universe. If character and story are more important to you than winning a battle, then this is the game for you." (Thanks, GW!)

Although it uses miniatures and terrain and dice, and there are customarily two or more players competing to achieve mutually inclusive or exclusive objectives within a scenario framework, Inquisitor lies nearer the sort of territory I customarily explore than it does to many wargames. It doesn't have army lists, points costs, or anything like that, and it explicitly requires a Games Master in order to run smoothly. It's given rise to some extremely popular novels by that Abnett fellow (Eisenhorn and his associates were brought into being as sample characters for the game), and some of the models are in point of fact absolutely stonking, and yet I never actually see it played with those models and those rules in that scale and as it was written.

Before we go any further I'd like to point out that yes, I know people do actually play Inquisitor, and that like all the specialist games it has its never-say-die fans who are out there, playing and writing and having a good time. BUT, and this is the big BUT, I think it has fewer than any of the others. I have to go looking for people who like Inquisitor. That's not the same as Blood Bowl, or Necromunda, or even Warmaster. All the blog posts I've ever seen about the game are asking "does anyone else remember it, has anyone else played it, isn't it strange?" And none that I can see are about actually playing it.

Gakked from Grizzly Adams, who wrote a post on Inquisitor which I managed to miss yesterday.
The one time I tried to play Inquisitor, I was trying to play it like an ordinary wargame. Wander in with my models that I'd rolled up stats and picked equipment for, find a mate who had his Inquisitor models with him, and try to play a pick-up game with a scenario jury-rigged by an off-duty GW staffer who agreed to GM for us at the drop of a hat. It was bollocks. I'm not just saying that because my Inquisitor got shot in the head with a boltgun after about ten minutes. It was bollocks because we were fumbling our way through this weird experience where we were standing on opposite sides of a table with our collections of models and an objective which we couldn't both achieve - competitive wargame - but we were also trying to roleplay out two Inquisitors arguing over... something that we didn't know about... and trying to find a solution that didn't necessarily involve anyone shooting anyone in the head - RPG. Trying to play it like an RPG failed because of that hard-wired "we're in GW, we have models, a table, we're on opposite sides, let's fight!" effect, but trying to play it like a wargame failed because we needed to play out and exhaust the story elements to explain why we were fighting.

There was a White Dwarf article about Inquisitor once that said it was like the last ten minutes of an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, where Giles has figured out what's going on and the gang are going off to prod some undead buttock. Trying to play Inquisitor the way we tried to play Inquisitor is like watching the last ten minutes without watching the rest of the episode. It might look good but you've got no idea what's happening or why or what anyone's trying to achieve or what, in fact, is going on. You can't play pick-up Inquisitor like it's a straight wargame.
You may, of course, be able to gain something from watching the last ten minutes of Buffy.
And yet, the weird thing is, it resists being played as a straight RPG as well. That you have players with multiple characters isn't a huge sticking point. There's nothing that actually stops you having multiple characters in an RPG - besides whether or not the system is lightweight enough to not melt your brains while you're doing it. The sticking point is that you have players with their own distinct warbands of characters and different objectives and a scenario that pits them against each other and you're playing it all with the trappings of a wargame. And it's not that you can't play an RPG like that, it's that people usually don't. The default setting for RPGs is players vs. environment as moderated by GM, not player vs. player. It's not an RPG, but it's not a wargame in the sense that we understand 'wargame' today.

Gav Thorpe, whose fault it is, said in this interview shortly after the game's release:
"Both in terms of content and look, and the way we talk about the game, we've made sure that it isn't for newbies. It's a sophisticated rules system that requires a sophisticated approach, being mainly narrative rather than competitive. There were a number of buttons we wanted to press, particularly in veteran Warhammer 40,000 gamers, that reminded people of the old Rogue Trader rules."
Okay, so what are THEY like? Tales of the Maelstrom did an excellent interview with Rick Priestley a while back, in which he remarked that:
"Rogue Trader and Warhammer both grew out of the role-playing boom of the late 70’s and early 80’s – in their original forms they were open format role-playing style games played with miniatures. I suppose our formative games were as you describe – someone would host a game and arrange a scenario, dress the table, prepare briefing notes and maps in some cases. That was all part of the fun. The most important rule was established early on – namely that the umpire is always right!"
God, if Mr. Priestley is to be believed.
I've had a dekko at the Rogue Trader rules, although the game itself was a few years before my time, and it's mechanically very open. There are no army lists in the original game, just a big master list with stats for all kinds of weird goings-on, and another big list of scenario hooks, little paragraphs to give inspiration, with one all written up and ready to play. The game isn't scaled for armies, but for individuals working in small squads, and it demands a Games Master to prepare a scenario with briefings and objectives and little surprises. It simply cannot be played in the way that current 40K can, where you roll up to the Local Games Emporium with your army list that you wrote at home and see who's free and play a game where your armies are the same size and you both know what the objectives are and you can be fairly sure that the game will play out in the usual way according to what you know about rules and tactics and probability.

And Inquisitor is just Rogue Trader, but scaled up, occupying that same liminal space between RPG and wargame. Mr. Thorpe again: 
"For a start, it gave us a platform to generate a range of highly detailed large-scale models in metal that would be collectible in their own right outside of a games system... Secondly, if you're going to have a detailed rules set, where you've got individual hit locations and are counting bullets in a magazine, you only need a few miniatures, hence the cost of a 'force' is comparable to an army in a different scale. Thirdly, much of Inquisitor was inspired by 54mm narrative gaming in the mould of Old West by Skirmish Wargames, and taking the ethos of that gaming style into the Warhammer 40,000 universe with heroic duels and exciting gunfights. Lastly, Inquisitor is built up on character and individuality, and this is something you simply cannot get across in a smaller scale. Being able to model a scar across your guy's cheek from an earlier encounter, knowing he's got three reloads for his pistols because that's how many are on the model, these are the types of thing you can do at 54mm."
And that's all true. BUT it's not just a question of scaling up the miniatures. As the miniatures grow bigger and more detailed and more characterful and more and more WYSIWYG-ish, the terrain has to come with it. If you're selling this game on spectacle and gorgeous models, cutting corners on terrain ain't gonna fly. The scale and style Inquisitor works in demands more detail, more things to hide behind and use and move around and throw. And while the current fan-base is right to point out that there's a lot of 54mm stuff that can be drawn on from other sources, we're still talking about picking up a whole new collection of stuff in a whole new scale for the sake of one game, when we already have these established 28mm games and communities and things.

Establishment is a particular bugbear when it's GW doing the establishing. I want you to think about the Games Workshop Hobby (hawk, spit!) for a second, what that phrase represents; "you came in with us and we've got everything you need right here." Branding closes gates, as I argued on the ol' Frugal blog before it went down into the West. Inquisitor opens them. Indeed it forces them open, demands that you go beyond GW product; it's essentially at odds with their usual approach to customer retention.


Okay, fine, so why hasn't it been picked up and run with by the sort of people who know that it's not "the Games Workshop Hobby" (hawk, spit!)? The sort of people who, well, write blogs that are part of the House of Paincakes network? Well, even if we know that there are resources outside GW, we still have to invest our lot of time and money and effort into scaling up to 54mm, which many of us would be doing just for Inquisitor. The game would have to be pretty good to be worth investing that kind of time, money and effort into.

Is it? Well, I asked around my loose gaming group, and one perspective that came out was this 'un. Ben said the problem with Inquisitor, besides the decline of support common to all the Specialist Games, was... well, in his own words:
"OK, so I'm an RPG geek. And a Games Workshop geek. And I made a decision to never try a game that I am basically the poster-child of the target audience for. All the people who I would have been interested in playing it with - and had tried it - came to me with variations on the theme of 'Don't try it, X is utterly broken.' There were enough variations on what X actually was that I began to see a real problem, not just one isolated mistake. (For isolated, see the AD&D 3.5 Call Lightning spell). So if I wanted to play, I was going to have to find a group who were willing to ignore all the broken rules and violations to background. And that meant I would have spent nearly every gaming session sitting there, being annoyed over broken rules and abused fluff."
So, from the point of view of yr. average wargamer, Inquisitor may in fact be a bad game. Now, I don't entirely agree with Ben. For starters, there's a lot more wrong with AD&D3.5 than 'Call Lightning' (oh, hush my mouth). But there's also an obvious solution to the problem of things being broken, and that's to house-rule the buggery out of them. But that's not really How Games Work these days, is it? I think the prevailing attitude these days is "I didn't pay twenty quid to do the developers' job for them". Even people like me, who enjoy hacking systems, still have other things to do with our lives, and might conceivably balk at a system that needs too much work in order to be fun. But does Inquisitor actually need that work? Here's a bit more from Mr. Priestley:
"For many years, there’s been a steady migration towards very rigidly presented rules and it’s all but unheard of these days for a rules set to even mention the use of a referee or Gamesmaster. I have my own theories on this (the world is becoming ever more left-brained and literal, moving away from the right-brained, intuitive approach!) and I wondered if you have any thoughts on this phenomenon? Are we ever likely to see a widespread return to rules aimed at the GM (as in Black Powder). Do you think there’s scope for this in sci-fi/fantasy gaming, or is it likely to be limited to the older crowd, who gravitate towards historical gaming?"

"The same thing happened to D and D – what was a very free form, liberating and empowering (if I may use that word) concept slowly turned into formulaic, rule-driven, prescriptive drivel. It is not the world I grew up in that’s for sure (not last time I looked anyway). Anyway – is there room for an older, gentler style of SF or fantasy game in a world where everything is points values and games balance – dunno. You can’t get back to the past. Lord knows I’ve tried."
I think Inquisitor is that older, gentler style of game. I think it was out of its time, an effort to remake Rogue Trader for a gaming audience which had either drifted away from that sort of thing, or had never stopped doing it and didn't need a revision of something they already had. Especially not one that introduced the demands of 54mm scale, and was arguably not terribly well designed in the first place. Some would argue that the GM has to compensate for the system's weaknesses - I asked my mate Blackheart about the role of the GM in Inquisitor and why he liked the system so much, and he said:
"It's less dependent on a good GM than a tabletop RPG, but the GM is still important. The GM doesn't have to create everything in Inquisitor, whereas in a tabletop RPG, they have to do everything - setting, mood, atmosphere, action, it all comes from the GM. There's a lot more done by the players in Inquisitor - all the imagination part comes from the player and not the GM. The GM in Inquisitor is more like a referee or an umpire and less of a dictator.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: I don't know where he gets this idea of the dictatorial GM from. Not from me, surely?]
The main reason Inquisitor is so interesting is the way that you can do whatever you like. You want to play something prodigously strange but also cool at the same time, you can do that. The setting and the characters are very rich, as well. I don't think there are any violations to the background, but if you're talking about broken rules... it is incredibly easy for rules monkeys to take advantage of. You need to play it with people that you trust. If you've got a group of players that trust each other to be sensible, it's an absolutely incredible game."
And I think that's it, at the end of the day. Inquisitor can be brilliant but it requires too many lightning bolts to strike exactly the same place; you need the right people to be interested in it without turning into something it's not, and who have the time, energy and money to scale up to 54mm. Frankly, that's too much effort for me. I'd rather just run some Dark Heresy.

The Weekly Top X- 'Lo Visits Von-

[Lo appears to be in the midst of a foggy, muddy field. It looks she’s been there for a bit as there are tracks and ruts all over, and spatters of mud cake her from the knees down. She scowls quite seriously at a scrap of rumpled paper. She twists it this way and that, muttering words that are NOT PRINTABLE HERE under her breath as she twists, looking behind her in utter confusion. Her rantings veer off into something comprehensible and (somewhat) printable after a few moments.] 




Where  IS Wolverhampton? It’s NOT anywhere Near The Hamptons... It’s not in Connecticut (last time I listen to that darn Xeno fool)... I know it’s in England... but this place is confusing as well... who the heck calls places WestANYTHING if it isn’t WEST!!!! These nimrods can’t even make a decent map!


[Loquacious sighs deeply and then rummages in her pocket for something. She pulls out a small metal miniature and holds it up to her ear. She quickly jerks back and shushes the little man in her hands.]



Look, BigSword, I KNOW you made it from his house to mine. NO, “consorting with the enemy” is NOT the reason I got lost. I get lost in the MALL, you petrified cum bubble. I’m horrible with directions, and that pompous Brit talks through his beard and I can’t understand a damn thing he says. He didn’t even have the decency to leave the clogs to point the way like I asked... that smug jerk.



[A voice drifts over the mud and briars. Its owner probably thinks it’s a rich and cultured voice, and he’s almost right. It’s just ever-so-slightly nasal, ever-so-slightly too fast, and ever-so-slightly... not to put too fine a point on it... smug.]



“Well, if that’s going to be your attitude, I’m not sure I want to help you.”



[There is a tall, pot-bellied man perched on a stile at the edge of the field, where seconds ago no such man had been. His hair appears to be migrating; thin and wispy on top, surprisingly lively about the chin regions. He wears a thick, sensible tweed coat, a pair of obscenely shiny shoes, and...]



“Tights, Von? Really?”



“I was practicing my clog-dancing. Have you ever tried to clog-dance in cargo trousers? It’s not easy.”



[Von discards the coat. It is probably fair to say that the rest of the outfit doesn’t suit him.]




“How the blazes did you end up here, anyway?”



[Lo somehow manages to scowl even more fiercely, in the general direction of Von’s shiny shoes. She drops her gaze to her own very muddied pair and sighs insufferably.]



I turned left at Albequerque? No seriously- I changed trains at Birmingham. Did anyone ever make it known to the monkeyknucklefuckers in charge over there that the Birmingham New Street Station will kill people in their tracks just by existing? And WHO DREW THIS MAP? Holy lord of kumquats, how can you make getting to the MIDDLE OF THE PICKLE EATING COUNTRY so hard?



“What does Burton-upon-Trent’s finest export have to do with... never mind. What are you even doing here?” 



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Branston_%28food%29


I am here to help YOU with Top X (not like I didn’t have “machine stuff” to do this week) since Lauby has gone and.... well... I don’t think I’m allowed to say. But he’s doing something important... so here I am. Do you have a topic?



[Von puffs a bit and smiles at his own thoughtfulness.]



“Why, yes I have.”



[Lo almost smiles, but seems very put out by the condition of her shoes, and keeps eyeing Von’s in something like lust.]



“Well, do go on then. I don’t have all day...”



“I don’t know - I wouldn’t like to interrupt all that standing around making mud pies you’re doing. Not that I can blame you, really - the Black Planet has this effect on people. I remember, this one time...”



[Von trails off mid-anecdote, realising that Lo’s rapt attention is not directed at his face, nor the words issuing from it.]



“Why are you staring at my shoes?”



Lo: Oh, no reason... just, you know, thinking. So you had this Top X idea?



Von: Oh, yeah, that. Well, I thought we could talk about the Specialist Games for a bit. You know, those things GW made that they don’t actually make an effort to sell any more.



[Lo’s adoration of Von’s shoes is broken for a moment at the word “sell”, and she clearly starts analyzing what Von is actually saying for the next little bit.]



“Go ahead then. I’m listening.”



THE ACTUAL BLAWG POSTS



Adam B of The Dice Abide kicks us off for this week, explaining why people get into these Specialist Games in the first place in his review of Battlefleet Gothic. http://www.thediceabide.com/2011/10/the-other-games-battlefleet-gothic/ The Specialist Games offer us something different from the usual rules and the usual missions and the usual builds and the same-old same-old that percolates in the Interblagotrons like day-old coffee and needs just as much sugar and microwaving if you want it to be palatable. BFG is a weirdly two-dimensional spaceship game but it’s sure as hell not like any 40K you’ll have played recently, and therein lies its charm.



Lo: A spaceship game? Huh. I always thought Battlefleet was... well... that isn’t what I thought it was. I will admit that I don’t do near as much homework as I should, and get confused easily (as evidenced by my appearance in a field in the West Midlands) but... neat.



Von: I’m curious. What did you think it was?



[Lo just sputters, seeming totally bewildered by the question. She doesn’t seem to have an answer, and the little man in her hand makes a noise quite like]


“You don’t know, do you?”



[Lo shushes him again.]



Lo: Quiet, you raving lunatic, or I’ll stick you in a drop pod...



Von: Poor lad. Can’t say I’d want to be there. I prefer swords to spaceships too...

http://cobblestonechaos.blogspot.com/2012/03/monday-night-mordheim-thoughts-on.html


There’s really only one choice for Mordheim blogs - Cobblestone Chaos, a blog founded specifically to talk about the only post-apocalyptic fantasy game in which fish and apple cores are recurring motifs. Really, I could pick pretty much any of Infamous’ posts, but this recent one shows the great attraction of the Specialist Games: lacking the pressures of tournament, meta, balance, edition change et hoc genus omne, they’re a much more ‘appropriate’ venue in which to mess about and homebrew things. You can of course do that with any game you like, and the success of Killzone points to that, but you’ll generally find less resistance from the people you’re playing the games with when you hit up the Specialist range.



Lo: Oh dear gawd. You know, I’m supposed to be the one that talks a lot, and says incomprehensible stuff. But if I got all that, you LIKE -- actually enjoy-- Mordheim (meaning Lord of the Rings) games?



Von: I wasn’t going to mention the Lord of the Rings, since you can actually buy it in Workshop branches and all. And, y’know, it is technically a Core Game.



Lo: That’s dodging the question, you know.



Von: Fine. Yes, I like Mordheim. And the Lord of the Rings game. Not that War of the Ring thing though, that’s a Hobbit too far. And not a Specialist Game. We’re going off topic.



[Von harrumphs a bit, consults a small, raggedy notebook full of indecipherable handwriting, and continues.]


http://theshellcase.wordpress.com/2012/02/08/necromunda-campaign/  Sticking with the gang warfare theme for a bit, Phil over at The Shell Case has written up his iiiinterrrresting take on background for a Necromunda campaign in the form of a short story, and iiiinterrrresting it assuredly is. Many of the Specialist Games lend themselves to this sort of thing, being concerned with smaller forces, individuals rather than squads, experience points, territory mechanics, that sort of thing. Even the more conventional pick-up game ones like Epic: Armageddon or Battlefleet Gothic are embedded in a particular campaign. They cry out for backstory and personalisation, bless their wholesome little hearts.



Lo: Could you be anymore patronizing? I’d give my left ovary and a few toes to be this creative when it comes to - well... anything. I swear, you need a heart.



Von: I have a heart. Several, actually. I keep them in little jars, on the shelf above my RPG books.



It’s the difference between the Specialist and ‘mainstream’ games, and the presence of house-rules, that occupy the ever-dashing Curis when he’s not illustrating terrible jokes about Egyptian pharoahs with funny names or sculpting Falcons out of cheese.
http://www.ninjabread.co.uk/2012/02/27/epic-squat-thunderers/ In this post he explains a key difference between 40K and Epic, and how various approaches to house-ruling manage that difference. Except he makes it sound interesting, and funny, and not at all like the sort of thing done by committees of grey men in suits.



Lo: You mean there’s articles at Ninjabread? Wow. I have to pay WAY more attention. I get distracted by the art. Well, I get distracted, period- I mean... how DID I find myself in this hopeless place, anyway?



Von: It’s not that bad. I live here, and I haven’t given in to crushing despair entirely. And yes there are articles at Ninjabread! I wrote some of ‘em, damn it!



Lo: You are a writing whore. I thought *I* wrote for a lot of places... you and Lantz with your ninety billion blogrolls... But somehow I like both of you. Maybe something is wrong with me.



Von: Is it still whoring if you’d do it for free?



The downside of Specialist Games, and the reason we all have to go around making up our own rules for things all the time, is that GW doesn’t support them waah waah whatever. Dead systems don’t have developers messing with them and invalidating all our hard work just so they can justify the continued existence of their company, so forgive me if I see an opportunity here rather than a problem. Especially since the rules for all of them are free, legitimately free! That’s not to say that there isn’t a very real problem with games being ‘dead’ - ‘official’ pieces are hard to come by, their prices in the secondary market tend to escalate into obscenity, and they’re very attractive to counterfeiters, as eriochrome warns us on Sons of Twilight. http://twilight40k.blogspot.com/2012/01/blood-bowl-skitter-stab-stab.html Check out the rest of his Blood Bowl archive too, it’s good stuff with pictures of and thoughts on most of the extant teams.



Lo: Oooh Blood Bowl. I’ll admit that my first exposure to this game is the video game, and that I’M TERRIBLE at it, but it is so much fun! Playing the tabletop version is a little ...different, after having played the video game- there are far fewer “cheats” on the table than in the console game; but it’s still just as awesome as sliced bread. There isn’t a week that goes by that someone doesn’t ask about this game in my shop, and the last “copy” we had was missing pieces and still went like crazy once someone realized what it was.



Von: Case in point - the demand for the Specialist Games is huge. I’m still surprised that the Mystery Box turned out to be Dreadfleet and not a Blood Bowl reprint.



Lo:  Well, the “Mystery Box” was a mystery to me- in how the heck to sell it. I finally got it out of the store on sheer aesthetics, but it was a rough go.



Von: Good job you did, or it’d be sitting there forever. Wouldn’t be the first game to do that, either...



The other downside of ‘dead’ games is that it’s often bloody hard to find people that play them. Some, like Blood Bowl, are perenially popular, well-supported by third party manufacturers, and enlivened by a popular computer game release. Some, like Warmaster, are perfectly decent games which, for whatever reason, never quite took off as they could have done. Warmaster Historical remains quite popular off in the world of rivet counting and accurate uniform pigmentation, but its Fantasy progenitor languishes in obscurity, beloved of a few people who would TOTALLY have gotten into it if there’d been anyone else interested in playing it with them. Oh, and people like Tomsche, whose blog Società di archeologia e cimeli is chock-full of 15mm delights.
http://tomsche69.blogspot.com/



Lo: If I could SEE the figures, it might make more sense to me to get into a game like this. I started out playing historical games, and if anyone could have convinced me that Fantasy wasn’t THAT much different, I might have gone for it. But, they didn’t; and so I continue to love Napoleonics.



Von: I think that’s it - they may have been trying to appeal to a market that was already pretty much saturated. Wouldn’t be the first time. I mean, there’s Inquisitor.



Do you know, I went back through ten pages of HoP posts with the New Google Search Widget (plug plug) and I couldn’t find A SINGLE POST about Inquisitor? Plenty about Inquisitors in 40K armies, a few bits and bobs about the upcoming fan-film The Lord Inquisitor, but nothing about the 54mm narrative wargame. Not a peep. That may seem like a strange case of affairs, but Inquisitor is a strange kind of game. So strange, in fact, that I’m devoting this week’s Von Show to talking about it. Since, apparently, nobody else does.



Lo: There’s a game for those giant things? We have guys at our store who buy them secondhand now and then, and paint the crap out of them. I think there’s ONE GUY who was making a large scale something or other with those awesome dudemens, but...that’s one guy. Wow, what a way to make money... and... HOW did Top X turn into a lead in to YOUR show? Jeez.



Von: I’m sure I don’t know. Maybe it’s my sheer charm and rugged charisma.



Lo: In those tights?



Von: Maybe I’ve just hypnotised you all with my sultry tones and menacing beard.



Lo: Does it count as hypnotism if I notice? Or maybe it’s those shoes...I do LOVE shoes...



[Von pauses, considers the matter, eyebrows wrinkling, and then enlightenment dawns, with a malicious gleam.]



Von: Do you want me to help you out of that mud, or shall I just leave you here for the wolves and GMort?



Lo: C’mon, what do you take me for? Even I know there’s no real wolves in Wolverhampton.



[The camera cuts away as Lo makes a sudden jump in Von’s direction, in a blatant attempt to steal his glittery shoes.]


Von: Get off those! They won’t even fit you! I take a size twelve! Get...

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